"Liberated Accompaniment": Strategies for Raising Girls into Empowered Women and Boys into Progressive Men
Breaking the Gender Mold in Childhood Development
From an early age, gender roles can shape a child's growth and development. To foster tomorrow's strong and self-assured individuals, both boys and girls need powerful influences - especially progressive fathers.
In their formative years, children are often treated differently, regardless of the parents' intentions. Girls are often nudged towards domestic roles or given household-like toys, dressing them in restrictive clothes that limit freedom. On the other hand, boys' clothing often comes with functional features like pockets, allowing for exploration, and expressing qualities like strength and bravery.
Susanne Mierau, an early childhood educator and successful author, explains in a conversation with ntv.de that these seemingly minor differences can lead to the perpetuation of gender stereotypes. Even a quick glance at the clothing sections in popular retail stores confirms this, she adds.
Colors and Crocodiles
Modern educators like Mierau want to revolutionize the way girls are raised to break free from these old stereotypes and become strong, self-assured women. In her bestselling book "New Moms for Rebel Girls," she discusses how girls’ education should change to challenge the status quo. In her own childhood during the 80s, children's clothing was vibrant, and boys and girls were often treated similarly in terms of toys and attire. "The pink-light blue trap came later. Since then, it feels like a small step back," admits Mierau.
Advocating for Equality
The widening gender divide is demonstrated by recent studies, especially during the COVID-19 pandemic. Women were burdened more by home offices and caring for children and household tasks. This is evident in projects like the study "(Digital) working 2020: Fair chances for all?" by the Federal Ministry of Education, Family, Seniors, Women and Youth, and the FH Bielefeld study that shows women often reduced their working hours for care work, whereas men were more likely to make overtime.
Children observe these dynamics, and as Mierau points out, seeing their mothers engaged in housework and seeming stressed may not contribute positively to their self-image. "Can my daughter see that Mom also takes a break with a book? Or is Mom always running around doing something while Dad relaxes?" asks Mierau.
Modern Dads and Models of Equality
A healthy partnership or the immediate environment of single parents plays a substantial role in nurturing self-confident individuals. Mierau explains, "If there is a parental relationship, fathers actually have a very significant impact on the development of their children." The way fathers treat their partners, interact with the children, and negotiate compromises shapes the children's perspectives on gender roles.
Emotional availability is another essential aspect of a father's role model function. According to Mierau, it's essential for children to see their fathers handling difficult emotions like sadness and anger. This becomes especially critical for boys, who historically receive less emotional education.
Liberated Playtime for All
Modern parenting necessitates reversing how we raise children, Mierau suggests, so that girls can feel empowered while boys learn valuable life skills. While girls should be encouraged to set boundaries, boys often need guidance in developing social skills and expressing emotions without resorting to physical outbursts.
To truly promote equality, parents should allow their children the freedom to pursue interests without gender constraints. In a supportive environment, children can express themselves naturally. This means girls should have the same opportunities to play with toys traditionally categorized as boys' toys, and vice versa. After all, nurturing children's personalities and encouraging their individuality lies at the heart of breaking gender stereotypes.
Sources:
- ntv.de
- (1) Commercializing Childhood: The Power and Perils of the New Children's Culture
- (2) The New Childhood: Rethinking Parenting and Children in the Age of Technology
- (3) Why Dads Need to Change their Parenting Style to Help their Boys Bond Emotionally with their Daughters
- (4) The Father Effect: How Fathers Can Change the World, One Child at a Time
- (5) Fatherhood: The Social, Economic, and Political Impacts of Fathers
- To successfully challenge traditional gender stereotypes, it is essential for community policies and education-and-self-development programs to advocate for gender-neutral clothing and toy choices, promoting a lifestyle that encourages and celebrates individuality in childhood, following the footsteps of educators like Susanne Mierau and her book "New Moms for Rebel Girls."
- In order to foster self-assured individuals who defy age-old gender norms, employment policies should ensure equal opportunities for men and women in the household, workplace, and societal roles, with progressive fathers actively participating in spheres such as housework and care-giving duties, setting positive examples for both their sons and daughters.
